Once a week I have a meal that is off plan. It's not a "cheat meal". It's simply a reasonable meal, close to my recommended macros, that isn't specifically laid out on my plan. It's something to keep me sane while I'm eating a fairly restricted diet.
Yesterday I had planned a cheat meal.
I knew a few months ago that it was coming, so I was kind of looking forward to it. I have a nephew and 3 nieces who all had a birthday coming up. I knew we were having a party, so I was looking forward to my mom's angel food cake. It's kind of the staple birthday cake in my family, and it's awesome.
A couple of weeks ago I found out that we were having a family reunion on that day, too. I usually can't make it to those events because of work, but this one was on my day off, so I planned to go. These are always potluck events, and while I didn't expect to find grilled chicken breast and steamed broccoli, I was confident that I could find something that would fit my macros reasonably well.
I started the day by hitting the gym early and then eating my egg whites for meal #1. Technically today was supposed to be a "carb day" for my plan, but since I knew I was going to have a treat or two, I decided to go low carb for breakfast. Lunch would be the potluck.
As is usually for these kind of events, there wasn't an overwhelming array of healthy food, but I chose some slow cooked poultry item for myself and a couple not-too-threatening veggie sides. I was proud of myself as I sat down to eat. As it turns out, the poultry (chicken? Turkey? Who knows?) was really dry and chewy and I couldn't manage to eat it. It all went downhill from there.
There were desserts.
Lots of desserts.
My mom had made pumpkin bars with cream cheese frosting. My favorite! Every year at Thanksgiving we have those, but this year I didn't get to do Thanksgiving with my family so I didn't have any. Well, I thought I deserved just one. It was so, so, so good! I inhaled it while discussing my plans for my bodybuilding competition with my brother. Of course, my kids wanted to try them too, so they each had one. And a cookie. They didn't finish them and I hate to see those yummy treats go to waste... Do you see where this is heading?
A few hours later we were at my parents' house and I was starving. I mean, all I had for lunch were a couple pumpkin bars and some cookies. Let's see what there is to eat.
Mom and Dad's house always triggers me to eat a ton of junk. I know this, and I know I should have brought my food. But it was a birthday party! Who wants to being tilapia and asparagus to a party, am I right? Besides, there are more pumpkin bars! Cream cheese frosting! Did I mention that my home town has the best pizza place in the world? Obviously we had to order pizza from Maria's. (My idea, of course). Then my mom pointed out that she had some brandy slush made. Well, what goes better with pizza than booze? Oh, and don't forget the birthday cake, and cookies to take home for the boys.
Train wreck, right? I get kind of ill just typing it all out. And I know my coach is going to be really disappointed in me. But here's the fucked up part:
I kept telling myself, "I've been working my ass off and sticking to my diet really well. I deserve this treat."
What a load of complete, utter bullshit!
I've been working my ass off and sticking to my diet really well. I deserve to look really fucking hot naked.
Once that thought occurred to me my entire mindset shifted. I'm better than that. I know I have a rockin' body under this extra 25 pounds and I deserve to see it and to show it off.
I'm hoping that yesterday was the last binge for me, but regardless I am back on track today and I have learned something important about this whole process.
102 days to the stage. Weigh-in, progress pics and measurements in two days. Need to get my shit together right now.
Curious about my coach, training or other stuff?
Here's a link to my trainer, Coco Kissack, on Facebook
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